Post by Admin on Aug 8, 2004 4:42:15 GMT -5
Kelli P said:
The patient has eaten some food but no bowel movement
Halcion has made him crazy.
Abnormal treadmill. I think this is due to being a woman.
Urologist: Dr. Robert Waterhouse
He has pain when reaching for his wallet.
SOCIAL HISTORY: A 5-year-old with a 2-year-old at home. Her parents are both in the emergency room.
Currently he spends his spare time at a beach house that he and his wife have and he also gets off on home maintenance activities.
She feels like her left shoulder is approaching the place where her right shoulder was, and the patient would like to know what she can do about it.
The lungs are in the axilla.
GENERAL: This is a well-nourished, well-developed black gentleman in no acute distress. He is alert and oriented with appropriate mood and affect. Skin is PINK, warm and dry.
Last name is Ross, First name is Yvonne, middle initial is 8.
SOCIAL HISTORY: He is married and employed as a computer technician worker and software and one kid and one pregnancy and the wife pregnant.
With regard to the knee he is doing much better with regard to his knee after the injection and is feeling much better in that respect
Medications: Medications include Vasotec, verapamil, Synthroid and Biaxin. She has allergies to diabetics.
The leg vessels showed lower extremity narrowings to be relatively significant and blood vessels going through the thigh arteries, or perhaps even higher up in the aorta where it branches into the iliac arteries going to both legs in the abdomen.
Please see the copy of the enclosed knee for complete details.
Bilateral shoulder examination shows no difficulty removing his shoulder for examination
This is a pleasant female who has a definite bilateral antalgic gait with the left leg shorter on the right than the left
He decreased his Lasix from 80 a day to 40 a day. His rationale for this is that he has lost a lot of weight and that he has had bad taste and been going to the bathroom a lot.
He was also prescribed diabetes mellitus, which also did not help with his shoulder.
The patient and the case manager were present in the entire room
Positive cross-arm and this is increased on the right but the same on both sides
She has been told that she had a swollen brain in the past, for which she was worked up with a CT of the brain and was recommended a hysterectomy to improve things.
Definitely need to get physical therapy approval for him and need to go ahead and get him approved for physical therapy as well.
SUBJECTIVE: He is here for follow-up and was able to bring his MRIs as well as his both shoulders.
Back examination shows no pain with straight-leg raise into the neck
Involved in a motor vehicle accident on February 15, 1999, while on a TDY. At that point she was rear-ended from the front.
Over the past few weeks he has had one episode where he went in to take a nap in the afternoon and again his wife found him very difficult to arouse.
He is married with two kids and three daughters with breast cancer.
We will need to get with Dr. Weatherby in San Angelo at XX Hospital in April of 1995, who performed the initial surgeries.
Motor is 5/5 except for the right wrist on the left.
We discussed that 90% of these get improved without doing anything, the other 90% with anti-inflammatories and the other 90% with physical therapy.
It is best most of the day when it is not worse
The patient is a very pleasant 80-year-old African-American white male
She felt like she turned her left ankle, which was the opposite of her right ankle
The left shoulder comes and goes but she knows how to modify it
She is to monitor her daily weight, and she is to report to me if it is more than three pounds.
Mr. Smith also states that when he rises he sometimes feels dizzy and has to grab himself.
He has pain that is noted at times by his left eye and at times by his left nose
On HEENT examination the patient is acephalic, normotraumatic.
The father died at the age of fifty-six and then was in a vegetative state for a good two years and then passed away.
There is a slightly larger than small pericardial effusion
Soon after taking a Motrin the ventilator began to beep.
I do not see any sputum on the chart. [Thank God]
He has had labial hypertension. [The doc was kind enough to spell this one for me.]
She does have altered menses, having had a hysterectomy in the thirty-year-old area.
She is preoperative for laparoscopic surgery of her left shoulder. [Talk about taking the long way . . . ]
Exam of the legs shows the right leg to be 1.0 cm long.
Not from a doc, from a message board, but oh so funny:
This is a brand new HP color cartilage that fits HP Deskjet 710,712,720,722,890,895,1120
She lives in an in-law apartment with her husband attached to her daughter’s house.
mabs said:
I laughed so hard, I was crying!! thanks for brightening my day.
scoobydoo56 said:
Are these actual dictations...........
did you leave them or change them to make sense......
This is so darn cute!!
Don't laugh at my stupidity but i am helping with the teaching a medical transcription class in my area and I was going to show this to my students but I really need to know did you correct these or leave them because knowing my students they will ask!!!
Oh man thanks so much for the laugh tho this is hilarious!!!
Josi said:
Thanks for posting...these are hilarious. I have posted this before, but my all-time favorite is:
"Patient complains of priapism that keeps him up at night."
....and a surgeon who wanted to use an instrument he dictated as an "up-bill duck-biter"
Kelli P said:
Some I could change like "She has had some food but no bowel movement" I fixed to "but had no bowel movement".
Obviously I corrected "On HEENT examination the patient is acephalic, normotraumatic." to the proper thing.
Others I just had to leave or flag because there was no way to fix it.
"Halcion has made him crazy." Maybe it has, who am I to change that.
I think I fixed this to "enjoys home maintenance activities" "Currently he spends his spare time at a beach house that he and his wife have and he also gets off on home maintenance activities."
Alot of these are all from the same doc, who was a known terrible scatterbrain; most of them just got flagged or left like they were.
And what are you really going to do about these?
"The leg vessels showed lower extremity narrowings to be relatively significant and blood vessels going through the thigh arteries, or perhaps even higher up in the aorta where it branches into the iliac arteries going to both legs in the abdomen. "
"With regard to the knee he is doing much better with regard to his knee after the injection and is feeling much better in that respect "
"Definitely need to get physical therapy approval for him and need to go ahead and get him approved for physical therapy as well."
"It is best most of the day when it is not worse"
Yes, they are all true honest-to-god dictations. I have been saving them since I first started. I always try to fix it if it is obviously something transposed or whatever, but if it is just funny, like his wife found him hard to arouse, I just leave it that way because it is not "wrong," just a funny turn of phrase and someone else will get a laugh down the road.
One other one I do not think I put was the doc said "The patient is here today and says he feels like (the *S* word). I think under direction from my boss we did put the word in the dictation as a direct quote from the patient. That is the only time I have run into that one, though.
Alohadc7 said:
These are so funny. I sometimes say out loud, "Surely he didn't say THAT!"
Loved it. Thanks for the laugh!!
The patient has eaten some food but no bowel movement
Halcion has made him crazy.
Abnormal treadmill. I think this is due to being a woman.
Urologist: Dr. Robert Waterhouse
He has pain when reaching for his wallet.
SOCIAL HISTORY: A 5-year-old with a 2-year-old at home. Her parents are both in the emergency room.
Currently he spends his spare time at a beach house that he and his wife have and he also gets off on home maintenance activities.
She feels like her left shoulder is approaching the place where her right shoulder was, and the patient would like to know what she can do about it.
The lungs are in the axilla.
GENERAL: This is a well-nourished, well-developed black gentleman in no acute distress. He is alert and oriented with appropriate mood and affect. Skin is PINK, warm and dry.
Last name is Ross, First name is Yvonne, middle initial is 8.
SOCIAL HISTORY: He is married and employed as a computer technician worker and software and one kid and one pregnancy and the wife pregnant.
With regard to the knee he is doing much better with regard to his knee after the injection and is feeling much better in that respect
Medications: Medications include Vasotec, verapamil, Synthroid and Biaxin. She has allergies to diabetics.
The leg vessels showed lower extremity narrowings to be relatively significant and blood vessels going through the thigh arteries, or perhaps even higher up in the aorta where it branches into the iliac arteries going to both legs in the abdomen.
Please see the copy of the enclosed knee for complete details.
Bilateral shoulder examination shows no difficulty removing his shoulder for examination
This is a pleasant female who has a definite bilateral antalgic gait with the left leg shorter on the right than the left
He decreased his Lasix from 80 a day to 40 a day. His rationale for this is that he has lost a lot of weight and that he has had bad taste and been going to the bathroom a lot.
He was also prescribed diabetes mellitus, which also did not help with his shoulder.
The patient and the case manager were present in the entire room
Positive cross-arm and this is increased on the right but the same on both sides
She has been told that she had a swollen brain in the past, for which she was worked up with a CT of the brain and was recommended a hysterectomy to improve things.
Definitely need to get physical therapy approval for him and need to go ahead and get him approved for physical therapy as well.
SUBJECTIVE: He is here for follow-up and was able to bring his MRIs as well as his both shoulders.
Back examination shows no pain with straight-leg raise into the neck
Involved in a motor vehicle accident on February 15, 1999, while on a TDY. At that point she was rear-ended from the front.
Over the past few weeks he has had one episode where he went in to take a nap in the afternoon and again his wife found him very difficult to arouse.
He is married with two kids and three daughters with breast cancer.
We will need to get with Dr. Weatherby in San Angelo at XX Hospital in April of 1995, who performed the initial surgeries.
Motor is 5/5 except for the right wrist on the left.
We discussed that 90% of these get improved without doing anything, the other 90% with anti-inflammatories and the other 90% with physical therapy.
It is best most of the day when it is not worse
The patient is a very pleasant 80-year-old African-American white male
She felt like she turned her left ankle, which was the opposite of her right ankle
The left shoulder comes and goes but she knows how to modify it
She is to monitor her daily weight, and she is to report to me if it is more than three pounds.
Mr. Smith also states that when he rises he sometimes feels dizzy and has to grab himself.
He has pain that is noted at times by his left eye and at times by his left nose
On HEENT examination the patient is acephalic, normotraumatic.
The father died at the age of fifty-six and then was in a vegetative state for a good two years and then passed away.
There is a slightly larger than small pericardial effusion
Soon after taking a Motrin the ventilator began to beep.
I do not see any sputum on the chart. [Thank God]
He has had labial hypertension. [The doc was kind enough to spell this one for me.]
She does have altered menses, having had a hysterectomy in the thirty-year-old area.
She is preoperative for laparoscopic surgery of her left shoulder. [Talk about taking the long way . . . ]
Exam of the legs shows the right leg to be 1.0 cm long.
Not from a doc, from a message board, but oh so funny:
This is a brand new HP color cartilage that fits HP Deskjet 710,712,720,722,890,895,1120
She lives in an in-law apartment with her husband attached to her daughter’s house.
mabs said:
I laughed so hard, I was crying!! thanks for brightening my day.
scoobydoo56 said:
Are these actual dictations...........
did you leave them or change them to make sense......
This is so darn cute!!
Don't laugh at my stupidity but i am helping with the teaching a medical transcription class in my area and I was going to show this to my students but I really need to know did you correct these or leave them because knowing my students they will ask!!!
Oh man thanks so much for the laugh tho this is hilarious!!!
Josi said:
Thanks for posting...these are hilarious. I have posted this before, but my all-time favorite is:
"Patient complains of priapism that keeps him up at night."
....and a surgeon who wanted to use an instrument he dictated as an "up-bill duck-biter"
Kelli P said:
Some I could change like "She has had some food but no bowel movement" I fixed to "but had no bowel movement".
Obviously I corrected "On HEENT examination the patient is acephalic, normotraumatic." to the proper thing.
Others I just had to leave or flag because there was no way to fix it.
"Halcion has made him crazy." Maybe it has, who am I to change that.
I think I fixed this to "enjoys home maintenance activities" "Currently he spends his spare time at a beach house that he and his wife have and he also gets off on home maintenance activities."
Alot of these are all from the same doc, who was a known terrible scatterbrain; most of them just got flagged or left like they were.
And what are you really going to do about these?
"The leg vessels showed lower extremity narrowings to be relatively significant and blood vessels going through the thigh arteries, or perhaps even higher up in the aorta where it branches into the iliac arteries going to both legs in the abdomen. "
"With regard to the knee he is doing much better with regard to his knee after the injection and is feeling much better in that respect "
"Definitely need to get physical therapy approval for him and need to go ahead and get him approved for physical therapy as well."
"It is best most of the day when it is not worse"
Yes, they are all true honest-to-god dictations. I have been saving them since I first started. I always try to fix it if it is obviously something transposed or whatever, but if it is just funny, like his wife found him hard to arouse, I just leave it that way because it is not "wrong," just a funny turn of phrase and someone else will get a laugh down the road.
One other one I do not think I put was the doc said "The patient is here today and says he feels like (the *S* word). I think under direction from my boss we did put the word in the dictation as a direct quote from the patient. That is the only time I have run into that one, though.
Alohadc7 said:
These are so funny. I sometimes say out loud, "Surely he didn't say THAT!"
Loved it. Thanks for the laugh!!
Cora Harvey Armstrong-